Dear September...

Tuesday, 4 October 2016


September you're normally quite a difficult month for me, but this year you've changed. I went into this month with as much optimism as I could, due to past Septembers that wasn't a lot. I think September has always been difficult because it marks a lot of change and I am not good with change, at first it was going back to school and now it's going back to Uni. I also have to say goodbye to a lot of people I like to have close to me and that's a big change. I was waiting for the melancholy feeling to come over me but it just didn't arrive. September you have surprised me, I now look at you in a completely different light, change is good, change is nice and I've learned to accept it and even enjoy it. 

The start of this month was spent saying goodbye to Gareth and packing up my things. I then spent a week with my Nanna as she was over from Ireland which was lovely, we went to a lot of markets and crafty places which was really nice and I picked up some little vintagey' crafty things. It was then time to go back to Uni and move into my new house, I was very optimistic about the move and I was even excited about meeting new people. I settled right in, my new housemates are lovely and so funny, they brighten my day. It;s such a change to last year where (to no one's fault) I spent a lot of time on my own, I now have a busy and bustling household and there's always someone to talk to which is so nice. I spent Freshers the same way as I always do, slightly inebriated and chatting to strangers but this year I couldn't take it off work so there were a lot of hungover shifts that I just don't want to re-live ever again, but it's my last year with these people I have to make the most of it! Then Uni began and again I waited for the panic to set in, but no panic arrived, just excitement. I'm really looking forward to this year the courses I chose look really interesting and I'm really pleased my dissertation topic is something I know I will enjoy.

Let's talk about mental health. This time last year my anxiety was at an all time high. I was just wondering whether I needed help and was probably about to book a doctors appointment in which they would refer me to a CBT therapist. I kept all this incognito because I just didn't want to talk about it, talking about my anxiety always made it worse. I look at how I'm feeling today and compare it to last year and I feel like crying with happiness. Yes anxiety comes and goes but now I think I can handle it better so I'm ready for it if it ever comes back and rears it's ugly head. Now I'm not saying it has disappeared completely I still get days when I can feel it right at the pit of my stomach, but after doing my exercises it just vanishes again. What I'm saying is that compared to last year, I'm feeling a lot better and I think that's partly why I've had such a great September. 

I have a lot to look forward to this month and the next and although you've been great to me September, I'm so, so excited for October because it is my favourite month of the year. I'm excited for autumn leaves, crisp air, mist, rain, Halloween and those candle lit dark, dark nights,because you know, that's my aesthetic. September you've been wonderful, but as I'm looking forward now, I'll see you next year September. 

How was your September?
  

8 comments

  1. A year can change a lot of things. And I'm really really really glad you are doing better with your mental health, beat it!!!

    My September was mixture of emotions, both good and bad. It was nice though, really nice :)

    xo,
    Not Your Type Blog

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    1. It really can and thank you I'm planning on it, slowly! I'm glad you had an all round good September it's always better to be optimistic and pick out the nice things, thank you.

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  2. Glad to hear you've got a nice bunch of housemates for your last year of uni - good luck with it all!
    Megan x
    Lucky Penumbra

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    1. Thank you it makes a whole lot of difference honestly especially when you know you're going into a stressful year, you don't want added stress in your house, trust me!

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  3. my September was good. A lot of things happened that didn't make a huge difference BUT made me optimistic about foreseeable future. I am waiting for the season to turn cold, which will only start happening by November. It's gonna take a while, but winter will be here eventually x

    Noor | Noor's Place

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    1. I'm glad, future planning is always good and you've got a bit of a longer wait than us then, you can always light a few candles and pretend!

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  4. I'm so pleased September this year was good for you! And that your anxiety is more under control, it's such a horrible thing so I'm glad it's doing better. Sounds like you had a super cute time with your Nanna too! x

    Josie | Sick Chick Chic

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    1. Thank you and it is but it's getting better everyday and thank you I did, I don't get to see her much so we made the best of it.

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